In psychology, building rapport is the term for getting to know your client and establish the therapeutic relationship. It's not just about talking and becoming friends- it's about establishing trust so you can accomplish the goals of counseling. While I wear many hats in my internship, counseling is a large part of it.
In the work I do with children, building rapport is the most critical, and in this first month of school it is obviously a major focus. I am sent to work with children that someone- teachers, parents, principals- is concerned about. The child has never met me, and may or may not agree that there is a problem. I have to, in those first meetings, convince the child to not only like me, but trust me enough to tell me about feelings and situations that they share with few people, or maybe have hidden from everyone. I use the term "child" loosely- I spend a great deal of time with young adolescents, who more even more resistant. While younger children are more willing to go along with what parents or teachers ask, adolescents are often angry (or at the minimum annoyed) that they are being forced to see a psychologist. Add to all of this the trauma that many of them have been to. I work in a poverty-stricken area of the city and am working with children
Over this last month I have slowly built up a group of students both in my schools and my counseling clinic, and that first meeting has been critical. I've been really happy with how everything has gone. I've always felt like building relationships with children is one of my biggest strengths, first as a teacher and now as a school psychologist. I don't know what I do or how I do it- I just smile and show them acceptance, I guess. I always have given the credit to my mother and her amazing ability to connect with children. I think it runs in the family :) My kids have been so open with me that it sometimes blows me away. Children who have just met me are telling me things I can't imagine telling a stranger. Some have cried as they have told me their stories and their pain. None have refused to speak to me, and from what I can tell all have been honest. All have been open to seeing me (even if they are not sure they need to), and some even are enthusiastic about our weekly visits. It has been very humbling to know that young people are putting their trust in you, and in turn, with the rapport successfully building, I now have to task to make their lives better.
I will end with the story that inspired this week's reflection. I had an initial counseling session with a young adolescent, and she quickly opened up to me about many feelings that she had been holding inside. As we left the room, she looked at me and said, "I already feel like things are better now." I was touched not only by her ability to trust me so quickly, but by how her faith that our work together was going help her. I hope I am able to give her what she needs.
It was a good week. Next week I will delay my post because I will be visiting family in Oklahoma. I can't wait to see my mom, grandma, cousins, and their precious baby!
No comments:
Post a Comment